Mother’s Blossom – Chapter 5

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The base is quiet for the next few days after that.

Once little Fa was settled in Plainsong, Aloy left on a trip to visit Erend at Hidden Ember. He had apparently called and asked for backup of some kind. Something to do with two sisters, a broken building, and an explosion to end all explosions.

It sounded quite serious, but by now Beta knows better than to ask questions about whatever it is her sister gets up to in the wilds.

Once Aloy left, however, Beta has noticed that Elisabet seems… different.

Her mother is dutiful in her work as always.

Almost alarmingly so.

Elisabet is constantly busy doing anything and everything she can gets her hands on. Tending to the chicks, expanding the garden, checking in with Zo and the baby, helping to restore HEPHAESTUS, completing her own tasks to counter Nemesis, coordinating with Yel about the farm. And whatever else she just so happens to have on her never-ending to-do list.

Her rather sudden dedication is startling, and actually causes HEPHAESTUS to be restored days ahead of schedule. The lingering purple of the subordinate function is slowly purged out of all cauldrons across the globe, with her and GAIA standing guard for as long as it took to ensure the process finished smoothly. By now they have already moved on to the very slow and tedious task of reuploading GAIA’s influence throughout the region. Something no one thought they would get to for at least another few more weeks.

Beta knows she should be happy that they’re making such fast progress, but somehow something just feels… off.

It’s small things at first.

Things that only Beta seems to notice.

Her mother starts staying awake later than usual. Working long hours into the night even after Beta herself goes to sleep.

Yet, she is still always up with each and every sunrise to call Aloy.

She isn’t eating as much, either. Tending to slowly pick at her own plate or let it grow forgotten at her desk. All the while perpetually making sure that Beta always has plenty to eat.

These odd occurrences are only made worse when Sylens arrives.

Beta tries her best to stay out of their way.

Especially now, when she can clearly hear her mother ripping him a new one.

‘Do the words “crash the Eclipse network” mean anything to you, Sylens? Or perhaps your “legitimate birth”?’

‘Not particularly.’

‘Then let me put it into very simple words for you. Talk to my daughter like that again, and you’re going to understand what the term “unplugged” feels like.”

‘Really. Must you make everything so… familial?’

‘Don’t test me.’

He and Elisabet talk for ages after that. About things that Beta can barely make sense of.

It’s honestly a relief when he finally leaves.

But strangely enough, once he does, things only seem to escalate.

Elisabet starts spending more and more time alone, busy for hours on end. And anytime that Beta suggests taking a break, it is met with indifference.

‘I’m sorry, Beta. I’m in the middle of something right now. Maybe later.’

All of this sort of feels like.

Like…

‘Are you feeling okay, blossom?’

Beta blinks, coming back to reality.

She and Elisabet are huddled together on the couch, watching a holo show. Georgette is curled up at their feet, an uneaten bowl of popcorn on the coffee table. This is the first time that Elisabet has agreed to so much as sit down in a while, but here Beta is getting lost in her own head.

‘You look pale.’ Elisabet points out, touching the back of her hand to her daughter’s cheeks.

‘Yea, just…’ Beta responds, dodging. She ducks to lean further against her mother’s side, purposefully keeping her feet off the floor and nowhere near Georgette. ‘Uh… tired, I guess?’

Elisabet looks her over for a few moments, her gaze intelligent and calculating. She brushes a lock of red hair behind Beta’s ear, an understanding expression coming over her face.

‘Are you missing your sister?’ She asks gently.

Beta blinks and doesn’t respond.

It isn’t a lie. Not exactly. Beta always misses Aloy whenever she’s away.

But missing her sister wasn’t exactly at the forefront of her mind right now.

‘You tend to pick shows that remind you of her.’ Elisabet points out, nodding to the holo.

Beta looks at the screen, unable to deny this notion.

She just recently finished that series about the fairies, and has now moved on to another. This new show is about a teenage spy with long red hair, who makes the impossible possible. And she, once again, reminds Beta of Aloy. It also has the unexpected bonus of that character’s mother being a doctor. And it pretty much goes without saying that this show is now one of her favorites.

Especially over these past few days, when Beta can almost physically feel the distance growing between her and her mother.

‘There are bags under your eyes, too.’ Elisabet places a hand onto her daughter’s forehead.

‘I’m fine, mom.’ She gazes up at her mother shyly. When Elisabet gives her a look of clear suspicion, she continues. ‘What about you?’

‘What about me?’ Her mother asks.

‘Are you okay?’ Beta’s words are small and hesitant.

Her mother only blinks, looking at her quizzically.

‘Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?’


Something’s bothering you.’ Aloy says bluntly.

‘Nothing’s bothering me.’ Beta shakes her head even though her sister can’t see it.

The two of them are having a voice call.

It’s something they’ve been doing recently. Ever since their talk about what happened before Cauldron GEMINI. They’ve never discussed these calls beforehand. They just naturally happen; the two sisters slowly gravitating toward one another whenever Aloy is away from home.

And Beta would never admit it, but the fact that her sister thinks about her enough to actually take the time to call her is something that she will forever cherish.

Something definitely is.’ Aloy insists. ‘Is it about what happened? With Zo?

‘No.’ Beta says with maybe a bit too much force.

She shifts uncomfortably atop her bed, leaning back against her green storage trunk.

You can come with us if you want.’ Aloy offers. ‘To see the healer about the baby.’

‘It’s not that.’ Beta dodges.

That what is it?

‘It’s nothing.’ Beta’s tone is sharper than she means. ‘I’m probably just, I don’t know. Overthinking.’ She pulls her legs up and hugs them to her chest. ‘What else is new?’

Overthinking about what?’ Aloy prods again, unable to keep her voice from sounding a bit exasperated. ‘I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what it is.’

‘You don’t always have to fix everything, Aloy.’ Beta accuses. ‘Mom told you to work on that.’

Just tell me.’ Aloy says, resigned to this fact about herself but not ashamed of it.

‘Mom’s been acting weird and distant again. And it’s worse this time.’ Beta fiddles with her fingers and glances toward her closed bedroom door. It hasn’t been that long since dinner, so Elisabet should still be in the kitchen or upstairs with GAIA. Well enough away not to eavesdrop. ‘She says nothing’s wrong, but she hasn’t been sleeping or eating as much lately.’ She tries to explain. ‘It’s like she’s just, glued to whatever she can find to keep her busy all the time.’

Aloy hums with thought.

Now that you mention it, we haven’t been talking as much as usual.’ Aloy says, referring to their daily calls at sunrise. ‘Other than that, I haven’t noticed anything out of the ordinary. But not eating or sleeping…?’ Beta can practically see Aloy tilting her head as she processes her thoughts out loud. ‘Could it be some sort of relapse? From the merge?

‘I don’t know. I hope not.’ Beta’s voice rises, having not thought of that before. Her blood pressure spikes just thinking about it. ‘Aloy, if she goes back to sleep like that again, I-’

I’m sure it won’t come to that, Beta.’ Aloy reassures her sister. ‘I’m almost done here, but I’ll hurry so I can head back in the morning.’ She promises. ‘Try and get some sleep for now. It’ll help.’

‘Okay.’ Beta nods, trying to ignore the way her stomach turns as she hangs up with her sister.

Soon, Aloy will be back. And everything will be fine.

Everything will be just fine.


Beta wakes later that night with a scream, frightened eyes, and a fast-paced heart.

She lays there among her blankets, unable to move and breathing heavily in the darkness.

It was that dream again. Atop the Far Zenith Base.

‘Come with me to the stars, Lis. We’ll create a new world together. One that’s all our own.’

‘How could I ever say no to that?’

Elisabet left for the stars, never looking back.

And once again, Aloy…

‘Aloy, you have to help me! Please! Mom, she- !’

‘Beta, will you stop bothering me already. Just leave me alone.’

Beta finally tosses her blankets aside, feeling numb with adrenaline. She all but bolts past the blinking servers, and up the stairs toward her mother’s room.

‘Mom… Aloy… Please don’t go… Please don’t leave me all alone again!’

Faster. Faster!

She hurriedly crosses the living room and opens the door.

Beta pauses. Confusion comes over her flushed face as this room, one that has always brought her such comfort and safety, now feels nothing but cold and lifeless.

Empty.

 Her mother’s bed is perfectly made, not a pillow or blanket out of place. Adrenaline continues to course through Beta’s veins as she glances at the clock, which reveals the Old World military time of 00:56.

It’s one o’clock in the morning.

Much too early for her mother to watch the sunrise, and way too late for her to still be awake.

.. Right?

Distress courses through Beta as she goes up the stairs to the project room. She wraps her arms around herself, trying to control her shaking when she finds no sign of Elisabet here either.

‘GAIA, where’s mom?’ She hurriedly asks the golden AI, unable to keep the desperation out of her voice.

GAIA looks at her, and something in her expression has Beta growing still.

‘Elisabet is perfectly safe, Beta.’ GAIA chooses to say. ‘It has grown to be quite late in the evening. Are you unable to sleep?’

An awful feeling sinks into the pit of Beta’s stomach.

‘That’s… That’s not an answer, GAIA?’

‘I can recommend several media designated for sleeping purposes.’ GAIA continues. ‘Or perhaps specific medication if you so desire?’

Beta only shakes her head, her green eyes wide.

‘No. No, where is she? Tell me.’ She presses.

When GAIA only repeats the same sentiment, Beta turns and heads downstairs, nearly tripping over her own feet.

She checks the living room, bathroom, the sleeping quarters, the kitchen, and Aloy’s room.

There is no sign of Elisabet anywhere.

She goes out onto the patio, and then down into the garden. Georgette is traipsing about in her mechanical guard duty circles, but pauses in response to Beta’s presence. The pink Clawstrider moves to greet her, and Beta, in her heightened state, allows her to do so while looking around frantically with her focus.

Georgette nudges her as Beta’s distracted green eyes dart every which way, looking for her mother.

The focus doesn’t pick up anything. There’s simply nothing to find out here.

When Georgette nudges her again, Beta startles and looks at her properly.

The pink hue around Georgette’s eyes is familiar, but it isn’t the same as it once was. Elisabet is not here, and there is nothing inside of Georgette now but metal and sparks, dangerous talons and teeth.

A hunter killer machine.

Beta unconsciously grasps onto Georgette’s cables anyway, the familiar action providing some comfort right now as her breaths quicken with budding panic.

Georgette does not move, and the longer Beta holds on, she strangely starts to feel… calm.

The feeling of metal against her fingertips is no longer biting, and it’s easier to breathe.

After a few minutes, Beta’s head clears and she pulls away, looking up at Georgette with confusion. Rational thought returns, and she moves to head back inside. Georgette also moves, as if to return to her task, but obediently goes inside with Beta when she is called to follow.

Beta shakily sits down on the couch in the empty living room, allowing the pink machine to lay her head in her lap. Georgette’s weight is grounding, and Beta keeps her fingers on the Clawstrider’s cables as she finally finds the strength to contact her sister.

Her frame quivers as she presses the button, well aware that this is just like her dream.

Elisabet is gone. And Aloy…

Beta unconsciously reaches up her other hand to hold onto her hair, clutching a braid her sister left behind. Along with a resin bead encasing blue forget-me-not petals.

All of her worries subside when her sister’s voice floats through her focus.  

Beta?’ Aloy answers, sounding surprised. ‘What’s wrong? I thought you went to bed.’

‘Mom’s gone!’ Beta blurts out before she can think of anything else to say.

Aloy pauses, and Beta flinches, waiting for harsh words to follow for bothering her…

‘Do you have to watch that right now?’

‘If you didn’t want me to braid your hair, you should have said so.’ 

“You’re right. I don’t understand. We have the same genes. The same mind. The same heart. So why can’t you find the strength to do what has to be done?”

Beta puts a shaky hand over her focus anyway, needing to hear her big sister’s voice right now no matter what.

What? What do you mean “gone”?’ Aloy’s voice thankfully holds no bite or malice, only confusion.

‘That’s what I said! She’s gone!’ Beta voice comes out fast, her breathing frantic. ‘She’s not in her room. Or the kitchen. Or the bathroom. Or the garden– andIjust -andIcan’t-!’

Elisabet’s gone! And it’s probably all her fault.

Beta must have done something. Said something wrong. Offended her in some way, or…

Georgette shifts in her lap, and she abruptly stops spiraling.

‘I don’t know where she is. And GAIA won’t answer me.’ She explains more calmly to her sister, forcing herself to slow down as she squeezes Georgette’s cables. ‘My focus isn’t picking anything up. And I don’t know what to do, Aloy.’

Please… please… help.

‘Alright, hold on.’ Her sister says. ‘Let me try something.’

Beta looks up as an interface pops through to her focus.

It’s a request to add the contact “Mother🌄” to their voice call.

As it rings, Beta curls inward, waiting for an answer.

She blinks, however, upon hearing something odd nearby.

A sort of rustling sound?

She gets up to follow it, but the noise stops once the call disconnects.

Before Aloy can say anything else, Beta takes her turn and rings “Mom🪷”.

The noise happens again and this time Beta follows it into her mother’s room.

Her stomach drops as she finally spies the source of the sound.

Elisabet’s focus is lying there on the nightstand.

Vibrating silently in response to the incoming call.


The wait for Aloy to return home is agony.

Beta tries to cope as best she can by constantly running her hands over her braids. Switching between clutching onto pink lotus and blue forget-me-not beads.

Georgette stays with her all the while, a calm presence among the anticipation.

Thankfully, her sister makes it home from Hidden Ember in only about an hour’s time. If Beta were in a better headspace, she’d probably attribute that to the modifications Elisabet recently made to Aloy’s Sunwing for faster and safer flights.

But as it stands, Beta is only able to process her relief when she finally sees her sister barrel into the base like a woman possessed. Aloy’s eyes are enraged, her back straight and her posture commanding as she marches upstairs.

‘Hello, Alo-‘ GAIA moves to greet her.

‘Where is my mother, GAIA?’ Aloy asks, her tone clipped and holding no room for argument.

Like with Beta, GAIA noticeably pauses, but Aloy is having none of it.

‘Now.’  Aloy says, an unyielding protective ire in her green gaze.

‘I unfortunately cannot divulge that information.’ GAIA’s tone is soft and sympathetic.

‘And why not?’ Aloy demands. ‘It’s a simple question.’

‘I can assure you both that Elisabet is safe.’ GAIA chooses to say, but her artificial expression appears conflicted. ‘There is no need for concern.’

‘But how do you know that?’ Beta’s tone hardens to mimic Aloy, empowered in the presence of her older sister. ‘I have her focus.’ She opens her hand, revealing the small device. ‘And I can’t trace her footsteps.’ Beta says earnestly. ‘So how do you know?’

GAIA, while being omniscient in many ways, has mentioned it is difficult to track individuals if they are not wearing a focus. That even with the newly acquired HEPHAESTUS, it will still take time before she can fully survey the biosphere with machines like she once had in the past.

‘I know.’ Is all GAIA says.

Her words and her gaze are heavy, as if trying to communicate something unspoken.

Beta looks at her, brain working a mile a minute to understand.

GAIA wouldn’t be able to keep track of Elisabet if she left the base.

But, what if…?

She’s still here!’ Aloy and Beta both say in unison, having the same thought.

‘But where?’ Beta asks, watching as her older sister looks this way and that, thinking.

All of a sudden, realization comes over Aloy’s eyes and she hurries out of the room.

Beta frantically follows her sister down into the basement server room, barely catching sight of her entering through the door on the left. She squeezes through a vent after Aloy, quickly losing sight of her in the tunnels. At the end of the shaft is a drop, by which Beta almost clumsily falls into. But she manages to catch herself at the last second, and chaotically lowers down onto the ground.

She finds Aloy standing there before a secret door.

When Beta approaches, Aloy turns to her with a devastated expression.

Then, she hears it.

The most awful sound in the world.

The sound of their mother crying.

It’s very faint. As if, even when alone, Elisabet does not want to be heard.

The two sisters stand there, staring at each other stupidly and unsure of what to do. There are other voices in that room ahead, and it takes Beta a moment to realize they are recordings of the past.

“You’d hate it Lis, but… I wrote you a eulogy… No-one could keep up with you. Live up to you… I mean… Elisabet Sobeck? There’s only one. I miss you.”

‘Lis, GAIA’s an absolute wreck without you, and I’m not far behind… I guess you’d be impressed with her empathy matrix, though.’

‘Hello Dr. Sobeck, it’s Samina. I… I… Oh Elisabet. Peace be with you. Always.’

“Look, Lis, you were a pretty stand-up gal. I’m sorry you died… Rest in peace, Lis. God knows you earned it.”

‘This dream of yours was a crazy endeavor, but I would be lying if I said I hated to be along for the ride… Reposez en paix, Dr. Sobeck.’

The datapoints then continue, playing a few that Beta recognizes.

Messages from Ted Faro. The man who destroyed the world.

“Hello, Lis… you got to play the savior and the martyr all at once this time. Great work.”

“What are we going plug into their heads, Lis? A whole lot of history. A whole lot of so-called truth…’

“I’ve been taking a hard look at the project… I can make it better, Lis. With a single stroke, make it all go away.”

‘Stop talking to me, Ted.’

Beta would have laughed in response to Elisabet’s more than disgusted reaction, but that thought quickly leaves her head as another log plays. This is one she’s never heard before, and one glance at Aloy reveals that she’s never heard it either.

‘Aunt Lizzy… It’s Vivi.

Um, we were told that something went wrong with GAIA. Something about… one of her functions? I’m not sure which one, but the uh, the Alpha’s aren’t answering anymore.’

Vivian sniffles, her teenage voice cracking.

 ‘Everyone is saying that… that GAIA went offline for a few seconds, and…

The…. The doors are open. Here in Elysium.’

Beta gasps, her eyes widening.

‘I know you’re not here anymore but… I…

Aunt Lizzy, I wish you were here. You always know what to do.

But I’ll see you and Dad soon. That’s what… that’s what mom told me. We’ll both see you soon. Together.

I love you.’

The world goes silent after that, so utterly still that you could hear a pin drop.

GAIA is eventually heard chiming overhead in the next room.

Elisabet. You are hyperventilating.

‘I should have been there.’ The sound of Elisabet’s broken voice absolutely shatters Beta’s heart. ‘What good even am I, GAIA? If I couldn’t even…’

There is no way you could have known of this outcome, Elisabet.’

‘I should have known. I should have done something. I should have…’

It’s at this point that Beta looks over at her sister.

Aloy’s expression is much like hers, clearly hating to hear their mother talk about herself like that. She goes to open the door, having had enough of this barrier between them.

It will not budge, and the red rejection noise it makes causes Elisabet to abruptly go silent.

For a moment, no one says anything.

Beta then tries for a less direct approach.

‘Mom…?’ She calls, softly knocking on the door.

My apologies, Beta. Aloy.’ GAIA’s voice rings. ‘I have been instructed to temporarily seal this room until further notice.’

‘It’s alright, GAIA.’ Elisabet cuts in. Her voice is resigned and quiet. ‘Let them in.’

When the door opens, cool air hits the two of them in the face along with the smell of damp rock. This appears to be a hidden room in the control center’s layout, with datapoints littered in a half circle on raised platforms. Beta’s expression crumbles when she sees Elisabet sitting on the floor before a broken pedestal, her back to the door and her face in her hands.

She does not react when Aloy and Beta approach.

Aloy hesitates, her expression clearly showing she has no idea what to do in this situation. Beta can’t say that she blames her, feeling very much the same way.

They’re both still learning how to interact with people. How to provide comfort.

But…

Beta goes to their mother’s side, remembering something like this happening in Second Time Around. She says nothing, and only wraps her arms around Elisabet with the gentlest touch.

Her mother is cold, not quite shivering but definitely not as warm as she should be.

As if she has been sitting here for a long time.

Elisabet does not react to Beta’s touch, nor Aloy’s when she does the same thing on her other side.

They sit there together, none of them saying a word.

Eventually, Elisabet takes a deep breath and looks up. An interface window pops into view, and Beta notices for the first time that instead of a focus, her mother is now wearing a white band around her wrist.

Identical to the one she has been seen wearing in all of her past recordings.

There is another repaired message for your personal voicemail box, Elisabet.’ GAIA says overhead. ‘Do you wish to listen to it now?

Instead of answering, Elisabet merely taps a button on her focus band.

They are met with a man’s voice. One that makes Elisabet immediately recoil as if she has been burned somehow.

It takes Beta a moment to recognize the owner of that voice.

Elisabet’s older brother; James.

‘Hey Lis… The swarm’s close. Won’t be long now.

You know, I… when you first told me about all this, I didn’t want to believe you.

But we both know you never lie. Not when it’s this important.”

Elisabet only puts her face into her hands once more, silently shaking her head.

“I chose this. Enduring Victory. And I’d do it again.

I’ll always have your back Lis, and that’s never going to change.

So tell GAIA I said hi, and give ‘em hell for me, little sister.

… I’ll see you later, chicken butt.”

When James’s voice fades, Beta can feel water gather into her eyes as she sees her mother’s shoulders shake.

Aloy shifts, clutching Elisabet tighter. Protecting her as she takes fast, pained breaths.

When GAIA reminds her that she is once again hyperventilating, Elisabet slowly sits up. She runs her fingers over her braids, clutching onto her beads as if to hold on to something tangible. Beta’s heart breaks further as she sees the tear tracks on her mother’s freckled cheeks.

‘How long have you two been standing there?’ Elisabet ultimately asks, eyes closed.

‘Long enough.’ Aloy says gently.

Elisabet looks at her, appearing to just now mentally realize her presence.

‘You’re home early.’ She brushes stray strands of red hair over Aloy’s shoulder.

‘Beta called me.’ Aloy nods, her tone soft.

Elisabet looks at her youngest daughter.

‘Another nightmare?’ She asks with concern.

‘We’re not talking about me right now.’ Beta shakes her head.

At this, Elisabet sighs and wipes her tears away. She gazes into the distance, for once looking as if she is her actual age of over 1000 years old.

As if the weight of the world is crushing her all over again.

‘How long have you been doing this?’ Aloy prods directly. ‘Coming down here by yourself?’

‘Does it really matter?’ Elisabet asks, defeated and found out.

‘I’d say it does.’ Aloy frowns at her disapprovingly.

‘This place isn’t supposed to exist.’ Elisabet weakly gestures to the room around them. ‘I’ve been working on a remodel for a focus band. The same one I had back then.’ She holds up her wrist, showcasing the metal bracelet. ‘I’ve always liked them better. Just, easier to work with.’ She runs her fingers over it absentmindedly. ‘GAIA and I were able to connect it to my old box address, with all my files and messages.’ She uses the band as easily as she would a focus, bringing up a miniature map of schematics. ‘I looked over the original blueprints for the regional control centers. This room isn’t on any of the plans that I approved of.’

‘I remember you were interested in the vent. Back when you and Georgette were still…’ Beta trails off, for lack of a better word.

‘I’ve come down here a few times.’ Elisabet admits. ‘The messages here are… comforting. And it’s a quiet place to think.’ Her brow then furrows. ‘But ever since Aloy found that pacemaker…’

‘The what?’ Aloy looks to her sister, who appears just as confused by that word.

A pacemaker is an Old World object.’ GAIA supplies. ‘One that is currently referred to as an “ancient necklace”.’

‘Oh.’ Aloy says, now understanding the word but not why it matters right now. ‘Well, what about it?’

‘It means something, right?’ Beta deduces. ‘Something important.’

Elisabet will not meet her gaze, and Beta presses further.

‘Mom, tell us what it means. Please?’

‘It’s…’ Elisabet starts. ‘It’s a device, that goes in a person’s chest. To help regulate their heartbeat.’ She puts a hand over her heart. ‘A lot of people had them back then. And…’

Elisabet looks up toward the ceiling, blinking as if fighting back unwelcome water.

‘I suppose, if…’ She starts. ‘If someone were to be eaten by…’ She can’t finish her sentence. ‘An implant like that may be one of the only things… left behind.’

Aloy sits back, stunned with wide eyes.

Beta places a shocked hand over her mouth, both of them equally horrified.

Aloy had said that ancient necklaces are found everywhere in this world. So much so that they aren’t even worth much in trade. No one knows of their true origins, nor even cared enough about them to ask. Both Beta and Aloy included.

But neither one of them could have imagined they come from something as horrific as this.

‘That pacemaker came from someone.’ Elisabet continues, talking with her hands as if to try to get the words out. ‘Someone who was scared. And… and helpless. Just like the billions of other people that…’ Her voice gets shaky as she closes her eyes.

‘Mother…’ Aloy puts a hand on her arm, her eyebrows upturned as Elisabet’s breath quickens once more.

A trait that she apparently shares with Beta when distressed.

‘Everyone is dead.’ Elisabet says with finality. ‘Everyone.’ She says, her eyes far away in the past. ‘Sometimes I get lost in that thought. That I’m the only one left.’

She looks down at her shaky fingers.

‘I still hear their voices. The Alphas.’ She confesses. ‘I hear Erend’s music, and for a second, I think that it’s Travis. Or I look at the chicks we have, and I see Charles. And the machines… all of them have Margo’s blue eyes.’

Elisabet leans forward and puts her face into her hands again, her whole body shaking.

‘I wish they could have seen it. All of it.’ Her voice is choppy as she takes shuddering breaths. ‘What GAIA’s been able to do.’

‘Me too.’ Beta says, squeezing her arms around Elisabet.

‘Me three.’ Aloy says earnestly, doing the same thing on their mother’s other side. ‘I had a feeling that Elysium was where you found that footage from Vivian and Sarah. In your focus memories.’ She deduces, her expression complicated as she thinks of Elisabet’s niece and sister-in-law. ‘GAIA told me that her connection to that place was cut before the 100 years of life support were up. But I never thought that…’

‘I should have known Ted would pull something this stupid.’ Elisabet’s nose wrinkles with disgust at his name. ‘Omega Clearance?’ She spits with wrath and revulsion. ‘He could have ruined everything, not just APOLLO.’ Her words are clipped with unbridled rage. ‘He condemned all of those people to death. There wasn’t even-’ She takes in a breath, steeling herself. ‘There wasn’t anything left of them. Just… ancient necklaces. Among other things.’ She struggles to say the new world term. ‘Two weeks. That’s how long they actually had to live in Elysium. That’s all.’

‘Please don’t blame yourself for that, mother.’ Aloy says earnestly.

‘It wasn’t your fault.’ Beta agrees. ‘GAIA’s right. You couldn’t have known.’

‘It’s just another thing I have to live with.’ Elisabet does not acknowledge that notion one way or the other. ‘There’s so many things I wish I could change.’ She leans back and rubs her temples, looking absolutely exhausted. ‘There was so much pressure. I crammed decades of work into not even two years. And the people…’ She pauses. ‘My name was whispered all over the world. The “brilliant scientist who created Project Zero Dawn.”’ She closes her eyes, ashamed. ‘I couldn’t save them. I couldn’t save anyone. Not even myself.’

‘I can’t even imagine it.’ Aloy empathizes, well aware of that kind of pressure.

But even then, all of what she’s encountered must pale in comparison to what her mother has gone through on such a global scale.

‘Making the presentation was the hardest part.’ Elisabet’s words come out like a waterfall. As if a dam has broken. ‘I must have re-recorded it about a hundred times. And I was still never happy with it.’ She purses her lips. ‘How can you tell someone that they’re going to die? And not just them, their entire family. Their friends. Everyone. Everything.’

Elisabet then pauses, the weight of her words heavy as a dark shadow passes over her face.

‘I was the only who knew the whole truth. Really knew it. From the very beginning.’

‘You couldn’t talk to anyone?’ Beta asks, her voice a quiet nudge for her mother to keep talking. ‘I know that you couldn’t tell anyone outside of ZD, but…’

‘I talked to Sarah and Vivi. They were allowed to visit me at first, but only few and far between. And never for very long.’ Elisabet then pauses, a solemn expression overcoming her face. ‘One time, Vivi somehow knew it would be the last.’ She recounts. ‘I remember her just… clutching onto me. Crying.’ She grips her arms, nails digging into her cold skin. ‘I never saw her or Sarah again after that.’ She looks down at her focus band with a sigh. ‘At least now I know what really happened to them.’

Both of her daughters lean into her, neither of them saying anything and simply wanting to hear her speak.

‘I found their focuses in Elysium.’ Elisabet brings up a picture from her focus band. A photo of herself, James, Sarah and Vivian standing together outside of Miriam Technologies. ‘Then I found where James’s plane went down.’ She looks at her two daughters, then back towards the picture of her family. ‘That’s why I took so long to get here. After everything at the Zenith Base.’ She confesses. ‘I even went to GAIA Prime, too, and finally buried the Alphas the way they deserved.’

‘So you saw the…’ Aloy hesitates. ‘Memorial?’

‘I did.’ Elisabet confirms. ‘And Charles was right; I do hate it.’ Her nose scrunches, before easing just a little. ‘But the flowers are…’ She brings up a picture of the ancient memorial hidden away in GAIA Prime. ‘Red roses, for respect and grief. And yellow roses, for strong ties.’ She allows her fingers to trace a few of the holographic petals. ‘To honor the life of a close friend. And a connection that death can’t sever.’

When Elisabet finishes, her face is pinched and bittersweet.

‘It must have brought up a lot of memories.’ Beta says sympathetically. ‘Seeing yourself like that.’

‘You’d think.’ Elisabet’s gaze is complicated. ‘But everything didn’t hit me. Not until I finally made it home. And saw myself sitting there on that bench.’

‘And then you…’ Aloy starts, reminded of what Elisabet had to do to her past self so that she could be here breathing today.

‘I’m buried next to my parents. Not far from Star.’ Elisabet nods, resigned to this notion as she brings up an older picture. This one is outside of Sobeck Ranch. The whole family is in it, including a then baby Vivian, Elisabet’s father, mother, and Moira. ‘It was nice to visit them again. I don’t know what they’d think about all this, but…’

She trails off, looking between her two daughters.

‘Really girls. This is just the tip of the iceberg.’

‘So, this is what’s been bothering you?’ Beta asks quietly, reaching around further to clutch her mother tight. ‘Why you’re not sleeping or eating? And just seem… sad?’

At this notion, Elisabet suddenly pauses, hesitating as she grows still.

Her green, intelligent eyes flicker with flight.

‘There’s more?’ Aloy asks, perceptive as always. ‘Something more than, all of this?’

Elisabet.’ GAIA says overhead, her voice soft. ‘I believe now is the time to tell them.’

‘Tell us what?’ Beta asks, confused.

Elisabet only looks away, reluctant.

‘Mother.’ Aloy calls, placing a persistent hand on her arm. ‘Please.’

Elisabet stiffens as if she’s been slapped. She looks at her children, lingering on their worried faces.

‘You’re right. There is something else.’ She hesitates, unable to meet their gazes. ‘But it’s neither of your faults.’

‘What are you talking about?’ Aloy asks apprehensively.

‘There is a… disease. Of the brain. Called depression.’ Elisabet begins, clearly trying to break down the concept so that both of her daughters can understand. ‘It’s a uh, sickness. That you can’t control.’

‘Of the brain?’ Beta parrots, cautious. ‘What does it do?’

‘It can come out in a lot of ways. It can make you sad, anxious, apathetic.’ Elisabet closes her eyes, biting her lip for a moment. As if in an effort to force the words out. ‘I’ve had it before. Especially during the plague. Everyone did.’ She acknowledges, trying to explain. ‘In me, I throw all of it into my work. And I just, don’t stop.’

‘You did that before.’ Aloy says. Her tone is careful, as if not to sound accusatory. ‘When your company was growing. You didn’t seem to care about anything else.’

Both Aloy and Beta have watched their mother give all of herself to her work, even before the days of Zero Dawn. Elisabet had so much passion for the world and everyone in it, but none of it for herself. She didn’t sleep. Didn’t eat. And isolated herself from friends and family, as if nothing else seemed to matter anymore.

Elisabet lived her life like a machine. Still breathing, but… barely alive.

And the worst part was that nobody cared.

Because she had been so productive. Winning awards, saving lives, and doing endless wonderful things for the world.

The only ones who saw through it all was her brother James, her niece Vivian, and her sister-in-law Sarah.

And now her daughters. Aloy and Beta.

Elisabet moves forward on the floor and turns in place, now facing them directly.

‘Yes.’ She admits. ‘But there’s different types of depression.’ She extrapolates gently. ‘There’s one that happens to…’ Her brows scrunch as if the words are physically painful. ‘New mothers. Usually after they give birth.’ She says, watching as the wheels in her daughter’s heads start to turn. ‘But GAIA and I have been finding out, that it can also affect people who… recently become mothers, later in life. Whether through adoption or…’

Elisabet trails off, and her words leave the room in a stunned silence as Aloy and Beta process this information.

‘So we’re…’ Beta starts, looking as if she’s about to cry. ‘Aloy and I are making you depressed? We’re making you sick?’

‘No. No girls, you’re not.’ Elisabet immediately denies, leaning forward to clutch both of their hands. ‘I’m making myself sick.’ She clarifies. ‘I don’t…’ She pauses, struggling to say the words. ‘I never thought this would happen. That’d I’d actually get the chance to be a mom.’ She confesses. ‘And… sometimes it feels like everything I’m doing is wrong. Especially after everything that you two have been through.’ She squeezes their hands. ‘And now with Zo, and the baby. It’s just….’

‘We heard you say something like that. At the ruin.’ Aloy says, having no remorse about eavesdropping. ‘That you don’t think you’re a good mother.’ She clarifies. ‘Don’t you think we should be the ones deciding that?’ She gestures between herself and her sister. Her eyes crinkle with hurt even as an angered frown is on her lips. ‘Why didn’t you tell us any of this?’

In response, Elisabet only looks resigned and turns back to the picture of her family.

Particularly to the image of Miriam, who is seen smiling right in the middle, holding the family together despite everything.

Like mother, like daughter.’ Elisabet whispers. ‘Your grandmother… she never wanted us to know when she was upset, either.’ She takes in a shaky breath as she looks at the photo. ‘I’m the same way. Because…’ She gazes at her daughters, her eyes fond and fluttering as if about to break. ‘I know how much it hurts. To see your mother cry.’ Her words are earnest. ‘How painful it is.’

‘Not as painful as knowing you were going through this alone.’ Beta’s expression matches her sister’s.

‘I’d rather that.’ Elisabet shakes her head. ‘All I do is worry you two.’ She admits, this notion clearly very distressing to her for some reason. ‘And after what happened with the merge, I-’ She pauses, gathering her words. ‘I’m so sorry. I never meant to be in a coma for that long.’ She says, her voice choked. ‘I know exactly how hard that must have felt. Because…’

She reaches out, cupping both of her daughter’s cheeks with shaky fingers for a moment, before tapping her focus band. An image is brought up of Elisabet and Miriam, back from when she was a kid. The two of them are smiling at the camera, caught together in an embrace that is impossibly close while sitting upon a familiar bench of stone.

‘I literally watched my mother fade away before my eyes. She was…’ Her voice hitches as the picture auto-shifts into another, showcasing one of her and Miriam in the hospital.

When Miriam was battling the deadly Old World disease called cancer.

‘I miss her. Every single day.’ Elisabet’s breaths are choppy. ‘She was my everything. She knew me for all that I am, and…’ Aloy and Beta are silent, listening to every word. ‘There was nothing I could do.’ She pauses, her eyes crinkling with unwelcome water. ‘And I hate myself for putting you two through something like that. It’s my worst regret.’

‘That wasn’t your fault.’ Aloy clutches her mother’s hand. ‘Beta and I don’t blame you at all.’

‘I know. But I should have known. The merge was-‘

‘Don’t.’ Beta presses forward to cling onto her. ‘Don’t. Please just stop, mom.’

Elisabet only lets out a weary breath.

When her eldest daughter also clutches onto her, she wraps her arms around them both.

 ‘I never thought that motherhood would feel like this.’ She whispers, tightly embracing both of her children. ‘I love you two so much that it scares me. I would do anything for you. Die all over again, be a machine again, and then some.’ Her expression softens, her eyes half-lidding with affection as she runs her fingers through their hair. ‘And I wish…’

Elisabet pauses, closing her eyes.

‘What I really wish. Is that Moira could be here.’

Beta pauses at the weight of this notion.

Moira. Elisabet’s late wife. The person who she wanted to start a family with.

If she were here, then…

‘Would she have liked us, you think?’ Beta asks shyly.

‘She would have adored you.’ A smile comes over Elisabet’s face for the first time tonight. ‘She always said that she would be the “fun” parent.’ She recounts. ‘And I would be the “actual” parent. The one who gets things done instead of playing around all day.’ She reminisces, fondly rolling her eyes. ‘Moira was so ready to be a mother. But she never got the chance.’

Her face then falls, lost in memories.

‘And I never once thought that I would be doing this without her.’ She taps her focus band, going further into the database of her memories to a page that her daughters have never seen before. ‘I know I gave you both access, but there are a few things that I’ve kept to myself.’ She says with no remorse. ‘I did ask GAIA to give them to you if something happened.’ She looks at them both seriously. ‘But you asked me before, about the name of our child.’ She recounts. ‘And it’s true that we never got the chance to pick one out. But there was something else.’

‘Something else?’ Aloy remembers that conversation from what feels like ages ago now.

It seemed like such a painful topic for Elisabet to talk about, so the fact that she would bring it up again now is not lost on neither her nor Beta.

Elisabet nods, taking a deep breath as she closes her eyes. When she opens them once more, there is something in them that her daughters can’t describe.

‘I have something to show you.’


Bonus Scene:

Aloy sighs as she hangs up from her focus call with her sister.

The glowing lights around Hidden Ember dance among the dark, contrasting with the stars above and the sands below. Among the colored lights and the whistling winds, Aloy can make out the sound of bickering from the campfire nearby, as well as footsteps approaching on the grains.

‘Hey, Red.’ Delah greets. ‘We’re just about ready to finish this.’

Aloy looks back at the camp, where Erend and Abadund are hashing it out. Boomer is there too, but she’s much more interested in tinkering with her latest weapon to care about whatever it is the men are squabbling about.

‘Alright.’ Aloy nods. ‘You sure the perimeters will hold this time?’

‘Absolutely. We’ve got this one in the bag.’

‘Without blowing up an entire building?’ Aloy raises a red brow.

Delah and Boomer have been working on testing out their new barriers for Hidden Ember lately. Aloy has been helping by using her new manual override technique to drive machines into their traps. It’s a good way to practice what her mother has taught her, plus much less dangerous than whatever the explosive sisters were doing before.

Which already led to the destruction of a building that was way too close to the settlement for anyone’s comfort.

‘Hey, it only happened that one time.’ Delah says with a laugh. ‘Nobody’s perfect.’

Aloy shakes her head, her gaze distracted and far away.

‘What’s got your head in the clouds, Red?’

‘Well…’

‘Sister problems?’ Delah’s words cause Aloy to look at her suspiciously.

‘How did you know?’

‘Are you kidding me?’ Delah waves a hand dismissively. ‘I get that look at least once a day because of miss you-know-who over there.’ She hooks a thumb back towards her younger sister, who remains blissfully unaware of their conversation. ‘So, tell me. What happened?’

‘My sister.’ Aloy starts, crossing her arms and lightly kicking a stray rock in the sand. ‘She’s worried about our mother.’

‘Why? Is Mama Red sick or something?’

‘No.’ Aloy blinks at the strange nickname, but doesn’t dwell on it. ‘At least, I don’t think so.’ She looks away, contemplative. ‘But it’s not just that. I know something big has been bothering my sister lately. And I just can’t figure it out.’

Sometimes, the way that Beta looks at her…

Aloy can never describe it.

‘Well…’ Delah starts, looking thoughtful. ‘If it’s one thing I know about sisters, especially little sisters.’ She says pointedly. ‘It’s that the truth always comes out eventually.’

Aloy looks at her, unimpressed.

‘Does it usually involve explosions?’

‘Probably not.’ Delah admits with a grin, before reaching out to pat Aloy on the shoulder. ‘Just give it time, Red. She’ll tell you. One way or the other.’

Aloy only frowns, reaching up to clutch onto a yellow tulip bead woven in her braids.

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